I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
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