Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Randomize
