he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
