we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
She's the barista slut.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
