There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
