we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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