I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Just pee around me
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize