Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
