if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
