ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
That accounts for only three of the penises
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
