my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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