Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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