so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
