dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
