Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Randomize
