Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I have fence marks all over my body
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize