we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize