Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
