I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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