So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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