this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize