i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Randomize
