So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
