Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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