Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize