Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
