Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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