YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Randomize
