I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Randomize