I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
