i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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