dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
