oh god the rape fog is back!
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
