the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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