It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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