I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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