During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Drake has all the answers
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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