We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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