My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
