it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
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