I want to make a zoo with you.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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