you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
