No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
