we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize