The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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