Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
