wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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