I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
