If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Randomize
