Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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